I recently experienced a monumental breakthrough when I released an old pattern that I wasn’t even aware of-at least not in this context. A couple of weeks ago I was questioning a recurring pattern of behavior in my relationships. It was then that I recognized I had been living out the legacy my biological father left me. You see, my biological father passed when I was three years old and for most of my life I held onto the illusion that if he were alive I would be safe, loved and cherished. I kept this illusion alive in my YEARNING for men to love me and make me feel safe. Not surprisingly,
I found myself in relationships that were not necessarily for my highest or best. In reality I was repeating an old pattern of keeping the illusion alive. Once I recognized this I was able to honor the loss and the yearning and put it away for good. I realized that I had always made excuses for my father’s erratic behavior (he was dying of cancer) since I have a tendency to see people in their highest self.
Even with all my healing, this pattern of yearning was deeply embedded in my cells. Intellectually I was aware, but it was only when I got to the core of the matter that I fully and completely identified and released this behavior from my body and soul. I feel like I dropped a huge mass that was lodged inside me. I graciously thank everyone who contributed to this process of this huge release……